So it’s been about 2 years since I moved to Florida, but I can still remember everything I went through. Particularly how much it sucked, how I basically had no friends for a year, and how often I cried. For people who have just started a new school or have moved themselves, this maybe be helpful to you.
For me, moving and starting a new school was kind of a shock at first, but then it finally sunk in that I was not in New York and that I was not going back for a while. My negative outlook impacted my whole experience, which brings us to our first “Don’t”.
Don’t: Lose Hope.
This one is pretty self-explanatory but it’s one you need to remember. If you have moved, are moving, or will move soon, have a positive outlook. Things will get better, they always do. Not right away of course, it took me a year to finally get used to Florida but you will get there.
Do: Be Yourself
In Florida, things were very different from my small school in New York. There were cliques and trends and popular crowds, things I wasn’t used to. I immediately bought the Jansport backpack and the Vera Bradley Lunchbox to try to make myself fit in but that obviously wasn’t going to work. When you move and start a new school or job, you intrude on the relationships of others. You try to push your way in, get to know others, change yourself, but that is not going to work. I didn’t want change, I didn’t like the kids in my school and I was completely lost. You have to be yourself and not care what people think. The people who you gravitate towards, find common interests with, can be weird around, that is your crowd.
Don’t: Throw Pity-Parties
Now, I am the Master of Pity Parties and it’s not something to be proud of. When things don’t go the right way or when things don’t reach my expectations, I get upset way too easily. When I moved, I was having Pity-Parties like three times a week because I wasn’t getting used to the change.You need to distract yourself, whether it’s through homework or music, you need to stop feeling bad for yourself. Only you have the power to make things better, so get out of your head and start living.
Do: Get Involved
I hated my new school so much, that I didn’t even know where the library was. And when I finally found out where it was, I never visited (even though I’m a total bookworm!). In order to get used to the changes in your life and to actually make friends, you need to learn about your surroundings. Join clubs or sports, know the places in your new school, and know the fun places around town. The more you throw yourself into your new life, the more you’ll find yourself getting used to it.
Don’t: Forget About the Past
As much as you hope to move on and get used to your new life, remember that you had a totally different life before this. Keep in touch with your old friends and family, update them on how everything is going. I’ll go into detail in a later post about friendships but just remind yourself to not lose sight of who you used to be. But don’t hold on to that person forever.
Do: Accept Your New Self
No matter if you hate that you moved or are so happy that you did, you have and will change. I thought that I hadn’t changed after the whole move thing but I did. Meeting new people changed my perspective on the world, and I sometimes look back and can’t even remember how I used to be. You will never go back to your old self, and to this day I still sometimes wish I had never moved at all. But sometimes, in our lives, change is what we need. Even if we don’t realize it, change happens all the time, it’s just the big changes that throw us off-balance. When your life changes, you lose some of yourself and you find parts of yourself. But you’re still You. Just…an updated You.
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